Life is not (a) fair. It is a circus.
My mom used to always tell me that life is not fair. I thought I was being clever and original when one day I replied, “I know it is not a fair, it is a circus.” Well, a quick trip to Google shows that it was not original at all, but it ought to count for something that I had never heard anyone else say it before.
Anyway, the two statements work together to make a really good Metaphor for Life. Which is a good thing since that is exactly what I needed for this month’s “What I learned from…” group writing project. (Whoa, that sounded like a Hruzek quote. Been reading too much MZM. It is starting to rub off on me.)
If you only look at the first statement, “Life is not (a) fair,” it seems to be a fairly 
obvious, if pessimistic, observation about life. But, let’s look a little closer.
Life is not without consequences
A fair is an event. It is intended to be short-term, and significantly different than ordinary life. We (at least the adults) would not put up with it for long. The high prices, toxic food, trash everywhere, and raucous noise would get obnoxious fast. Real life keeps going for a long time, so you cannot afford to be wasteful or destructive. You are going to have to live with the consequences of your choices for a very long time.
Life is not the same for everyone
But, wait, we were talking about a different meaning of the word “fair”, but that is okay, because everything is fair at the fair. Everyone pays the same ridiculously high prices, for the same stuff that nobody needs. Life is not that kind of fair either. In real life, some people get free rides and get to skip to the front of the line, while other people lose their lunch before they get on the first ride – that is, if they get any lunch at all.
Life is not safe
The fair is also a safe place (well, mostly – work with me here). Even the haunted house, which looks incredibly scary, turns out to be nothing but a few illusions, and nobody gets hurt. And if anybody does get hurt, that’s not part of the fair; that’s real life intruding into the fair.
The second statement, “Life is a circus” seems to imply that life is just a bunch of wild out of control fun. But there is more… lots more.
Life is confusing
The first thing I think of when I think about life being like a circus is the clowns, monkeys, and general chaos. This analogy definitely holds true. Life is full of a lot of strange things, a lot of funny things, a lot of scary things, and a lot of amazing things. Life is full of variety which is the spice of life, but it is also very confusing at times. So many things are happening at once, on stage and in the stands, it is nearly impossible to keep up with everything.
Life is dangerous
A circus is full of real danger. Sure they use safety nets and declawed lions, but performers still get hurt and even killed quite frequently. Life is the same way. A single misstep could easily be your last. A circus is a lot of fun, but it is also a lot of work, and the real dangers are bigger than the ones you see.
Life is different for each person
When you attend a circus, especially one of those three ring circuses, where you sit makes a big difference. The lucky people that sit in the middle get a very good view of all of the action. They still may be jealous of one side or the other if the act they want to see happens on one of the outside rings. But the people at the edges are going to have a really hard time seeing stuff at the far end. It is not fair, but hey, that’s life!
Life has place for each person
Life is not fair for the performers at the circus either. Some get to fly high on a trapeze while others get attacked by lions. Each role is unique and different, but each is important. I’m one of those people who would love to perform every act in the circus, and if life were a fair, I would ride every ride. But, I have a role in life and I have to live it with the confidence that the show would not be the same without small and insignificant part. Like a dog jumping through a hoop, I have to keep doing my best, knowing that if I give up, they will have to change the name of the act to “6 Jumping Poodles”, and 7 seven sounds so much better.
Life is unique and special for each person
Another way that life is like a circus is that in a circus there is no star. Every performer is a star, but there is no one person who is the main performer in every act. The ring leader has a part in each act, but he is not the main performer in any of them, and most people would not even care if he was not there. Maybe the ring leader would make a good metaphor for leadership, but that will have to be another post. In real life, most people are famous for a few weeks or months, and a very few are famous the rest of their lives. But, compare a 70 year life to the thousands of years humans have been promoting themselves, and you get the idea. You are not star the of the show, and neither is that person you are jealous of.
You are Unique
So quit sulking about what you do not have and the troubles you are going through and be thankful for what you have. It may not be what you want (or think you want). It may, instead, be something you need to achieve your mission in life. And don’t think your mission in life is going to be the same as everyone else’s. You are unique. Your skills and abilities are unique. Your mission is unique.
First of all, lemme just say there is no such thing as “too much MZM”!
I think you’ve captured the metaphors well, Luke. Excellent descriptions of many aspects of life in general. Especially poignant is your observation that there is no one single “star”. Yet there’s a place for everyone, no matter what our talent or ability is.
Great stuff, Luke! Thanks for joining us this month!
Oh, and no matter what anybody says, I don’t think you look anything like a poodle!
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Hi Luke, Great insights. When you said circus I immediately thought of the confusing part, but the rest of your ideas never occurred to me.
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Your perspective in terms of bringing both of these sayings together was and is unique in of itself Luke.
On the issue of “Life is not fair”
Those of us who live in the western hemisphere are all either born lucky or got lucky enough to get here somehow.
Many of us are amongst the worlds 3% most wealthy, irrespective of the fact that we may have credit card debts beyond the ying yang.
So, like the view that one gets from the premier seats at the circus, perhaps it was not fair that so many of us get to eat 3 times a day based uniquely on where we were born or where we now live.
Oops forgot to say, “Great article Luke”.
And to add what I said above — Those who know that life isn’t fair, have it in their face daily. Those that forget that life isn’t fair, frequently take it for granted.
Dino Delellis.
What a very refreshing and interesting outlook on life. The ” circus/fair ” metaphor is funny yet very accurate when you explained why.
And your right despite how hard and complicated life can get it’s very important to keep a positive outlook on things. And to face it with a dollop of humor.